Second Generation Vietnamese-American Business Woman

Mike0:00Welcome to The Business of Family. I'm your host, Mike Boyd. Multigenerational wealth creation involves so much more than capital accumulation. The most successful families cultivate values, stories, knowledge and resources to pass on to the next generation, and they do it very intentionally. On this show I sit down with members of some of the world's most interesting business families to hear how they do it. To see where your own family stands, take the Business Family Diagnostic at businessoffamily.net.

0:42Crystal Lam is the managing director and second generation to manage Vina Wood Limited, Vietnam's largest wood component manufacturer, specializing in customized window covering, millwork and architectural moldings, exporting to developed and emerging markets around the world. With 10 years of operations experience in Vietnam, Crystal has led the firm's expansion into new markets, product categories and strategic ventures. Crystal, it is so great to have you with us today. Thank you so much for being here.

Crystal1:18It's a pleasure. Thank you, Mike.

Mike1:20So I understand that you grew up in Southern California as a Vietnamese American. Were you always destined to join the family business back in Vietnam, or did you have plans to pursue your own path?

Crystal1:33That's a good question. I would say this journey was definitely a path I was adamant to pursue. Growing up with a young single father who is also in YPO, I witnessed him dedicate his entire life to myself and this business. And in a way, this company was my first sibling. So I did have a shared responsibility for it.

1:55Now, at a very early age, I understood the dynamic of my father's commitment to both. He had me at the age of 21. He started the business at the age of 22 without family support, no wife, no grandparents or siblings to babysit. In fact, he would actually bring me to his meetings and often ask if they had a couch for me to nap on while he was in the meeting.

Mike2:17Wow.

Crystal2:18So, yeah. So, for as long as I can remember, I was very determined to give my father an early retirement. And I do recall whenever I would be asked as a child what I wanted to do when I grew up, I would always answer, take over the family business. So, that's where we are.

Mike2:35Amazing family dynamic. And it sounds like that's shaped your story so far as second gen and really passionate about growing this business, following in and building upon your father's footsteps. So one topic that we've explored on the podcast previously is that of cross-cultural family businesses and how growing families are increasingly global in nature. How have you balanced growing up in America, which is a very individualist Western society, with the expectations of family in Asia, which is more of an honor or face-based culture?

Crystal3:14That's a good question. I would say that I am super blessed. My father was very committed to upholding the family values that my grandmother instilled in him. And as a tidbit, she actually raised him as a single mother as well. So, it's really interesting to see how she raised him and he raised me and how I will soon raise my children. But the traditional value of filial piety was very strongly emphasized. But my grandmother had a very modern spin on how honor was upheld. So she herself was a rebel in her own time. She was a journalist back in Vietnam in the 70s. And she eventually published her own magazine, which was a Vietnamese magazine

3:56called the Vietnamese woman. And she taught my father how to think differently, how to question and challenge the norm, while simultaneously maintaining an honorable moral compass and a grace towards others. So my father raised me with the same belief system to be traditional in values, but be modern in action. And my upbringing was a wonderful blend of East and West as a result.

4:21So I found the balance of growing up in America with Vietnamese origins. It was an easy one to maintain.

Mike4:28That's fantastic. I love that global mix and taking the best of both by the sounds of it. Now, I'm curious, were there hurdles for you to overcome with your progression into leadership of the business? I imagine that female leaders of dirty manufacturing businesses, I shouldn't say dirty, but manufacturing businesses in Asia, that must be pretty rare, is it?

Crystal4:48Yes. Yes. I often say that there are three things that were against me at the time, three obstacles, I'd say, because I did enter when I was 22. So the first would be, I was a woman who joined the least sexiest of manufacturing businesses. I mean, if I joined something tech related, if it was making iPhones or something that would be more susceptible for women, but not a lot of women were in the wood industry.

5:20They still aren't. So that was one thing that was a challenge. The second was I was the owner's daughter. So people would often say, oh, in a very, not a very kind way. Oh, are you in charge of marketing? Are you in charge of some department that may or may not impact the bottom line? And I would answer, no, asshole, I run operations. So that would be the second one.

Mike5:44You go.

Crystal5:45Yeah, the third one would be because I was overseas Vietnamese, which in Vietnam, they're referred to as Viet Kieu. So a lot of Viet Kieu are tend to seem until proven that they really understand the Vietnamese culture, they tend to be viewed as someone who's disconnected, who really doesn't understand how to just contribute or feel connected to those in Vietnam. So those are the three main challenges that I faced.

Mike6:12So on the last one, how did you ultimately, or how do you ultimately overcome that? Is it just putting in the time, putting in the years to try and overcome that judgment, if I can call it that? Or are there certain steps that you can make to try and build rapport and respect faster?

Crystal6:30The quickest way would be if somehow the universe gave you a crisis. And if you really stepped up to that crisis, then you could really see how much you truly care about them. Obviously, you cannot create a crisis, but I was very lucky that we had a few really big challenges of which my father was not there.

6:53and I was very keen to really just stay with my team pretty much 24 hours a day until we solved it. Now, that level of commitment was never different before the crisis. I went down to the ground. I would eat in the canteen with them. I would do a lot of that. But from their perspective, it's not very memorable. It was just, okay, that's nice. Now she's just not a princess.

7:17Right now, she's not just a spoiled overseas Vietnamese. But when shit hits the fan and you could really contribute and show, A, how much you care and B, how you have the grit that you're not going to give up. That's when they say, oh, shit, like, wow, she's Vietnamese. Like, she's got it. She understands. And so I would have to say that I have been given a few of those curveballs to allow me to demonstrate that.

Mike7:43That's fantastic. And as you touched on crises, what has 2020 meant for the business? Have you been badly affected by COVID or have things just charged on?

Crystal7:55We've had our challenges by March, April, sales dropped by 40% because everyone just kind of people decided to use their government checks for iPods instead of blinds. So we didn't really get the benefit of that. But the good thing is we're very transparent with our team. We told them that just because there was a dip doesn't mean this is an opportunity for us to be ready for the next write-up.

8:20So we collaborated and we said, okay, ours might be less, but we're going to still work on more innovative products to diversify and to really increase our productivity when the demand comes back. So we implemented a new ERP system this year. We're still in the process of that. So we were able to take advantage of the fact that there was a crisis globally and spin it in our own way that, hey, we're going to optimize from this and just make sure we come out of it ahead.

8:51And the power of belief is just so amazing. So I'm honored that the team was just very on board with that mindset and that strategy and it's working.

Mike9:01That's fantastic. Making the most of the quieter time by the sounds of it.

Crystal9:05Yes. Yeah.

Mike9:06So just for the benefit of the audience, can you tell us at a high level a little bit about the business and what are the core products or core customers and segments that you're serving today?

Crystal9:17Of course. Happy to. It's a very niche product. So we specialize in wood blinds and shutters for primarily export. So we manufacture in Vietnam, but our biggest markets would be US, Europe, and Japan. And so you will never see our brand in the market because we are B2B. But the brands that you will see that we supply would be the Hunter Douglas Group, Levolor, or Nichibei, Tachikawa.

9:45So they're number one, number two in their markets, respectively. So we're in a quiet industry. We're happy where we are. And I'm just very proud of the personal brand that my dad developed with each customer.

Mike10:01That's terrific. You sound very proud too. I was going to ask about your relationship working with your father and also whether or not there's any other family members involved in the business, which I think you've already answered in some way. But how have you found joining the company and ultimately working with your father?

Crystal10:20It's one thing growing up in a household, understanding that your father is a success in certain ways, not just business-wise, but as a human, as a good human being. Obviously, you know it, but you kind of don't know how that is. So the cool thing about working with him is that I really get to see him make tough decisions with such high integrity. And it's something that I absolutely love.

10:48So the funny thing is, when I first joined the business, I said, Okay, Dad, what's my job description? And he laughed at me. He said, what the F do you mean, Crystal? What are you talking about job description? This is a family business. You figure out what needs to be done and you do it. And I'm sitting here thinking, I came from school. I just graduated from school. I'm used to midterms. I'm used to finals. I'm used to structure. I said, what the hell does that mean? So he gave me a very long leash. He said, just go figure out what needs to be done and don't be afraid to ask questions. So I really enjoyed

11:19that. And growing up, we've always had this partner dynamic anyway, because it was just me and him for the longest time until he got married in 2012. So whenever we tackle decisions together, it's always nice to be on an equal playing field.

Mike11:32And you mentioned earlier, providing for him in early retirement. Has he retired from the business or do you still work together day to day in some capacity?

Crystal11:44I would say he retired from the firefighting. But you know, he's still young. He's in his 50s. So it's his baby. It's one of his babies, so to speak. So my objective was really not just to plan a coup and be like, be gone with you. But it was very much like, how do I keep him involved in the areas that really lights him up?

12:08So he loves R&D. He loves just problem solving on the floor with the team. He loves anything that requires his creativity is where I just let him be. And it's worked out wonderfully.

Mike12:21That's fantastic.

Crystal12:22So I do the boring stuff. You know, I do the HR stuff. I do all that and I let him have all the cool stuff.

Mike12:28Have you got any spare capacity? I could use someone like you.

Crystal12:31Yeah, no. Well, you know, you have to talk to my dad about that.

Mike12:35so i'm keen to get into this the topic of the business of family i'm curious how do you separate family matters from work matters when working with your father closely

Crystal12:43so the good thing is because it's been us for so long and just the way that we are inherently wired it organically has we've been able to compartmentalize the both so there'll never be a time we'll have a discussion will interject how I felt about you at work and how I feel about you at home. Like I'll never cross paths, which is a good thing.

13:12Now, what's not always a good thing is that he and I are always just constantly, oh, new ideas, new ideas, work-wise. That sometimes we forget to talk about the family stuff. So actually, there have been times where we had to consciously call father-daughter forum. We will have father-daughter forum. And even there'd be times we call in a moderator or a coach to look with us.

13:33And it would help us refocus on the more sensitive topics that don't get easily addressed. But we always come out with a very clear understanding. And we always come into it, actually, that number one is what family needs, not what business needs. So we make it very clear that and then we go into the topic and then we always conclude on the same note.

Mike13:56That's amazing. And so I was going to ask whether or not you had a formal structures in the family from a multi-generational perspective. Is there a family charter or a constitution and whether or not you hold family meetings? It sounds like you are holding family forums or father-daughter forums.

Crystal14:12Yes. Yeah.

Mike14:13That's awesome. I haven't heard that before. It's a great combination. Are there other formal structures in place as well?

Crystal14:19Not yet, but I'm very lucky that my dad has asked me to take ownership of that because actually, I now have three very cute young siblings, a five-year-old, a three-year-old and an eight-month-year-old. And in time, they will be joining the conversation. So I do believe while everyone is still young and healthy, and while we have the capacity to focus on it, then it's good to set that structure. So that will be something that we will be doing.

Mike14:49Amazing. Does the family have any keepsakes or heirlooms that are really meaningful to your history? I had heard through the grapevine that you're quite passionate about art. I'd love to hear about that.

Crystal15:00Oh, yes, we are. It's a wonderful thing to witness your parents find a particular passion. It's nice to see a parent stay up late at night, not worrying about work, but more so just researching art. And I've loved that my dad's been very active in that for many years now, and we join in together on the auctions. But I would say, and primarily we focus on Southeast Asian art because that is something that we're proud of. We're very proud of the region and we feel that it really needs to be appreciated. But I wouldn't necessarily identify any of those items as a specific heirloom or keepsake.

15:40Actually, if anything, the practice of acquiring it together or visiting it together is more meaningful than I am itself, although the art market might disagree with that. But yeah, it's more the tradition and the practice of it than the piece itself.

Mike15:57Interesting. And is there a particular style of art from the region that you're passionate about or is it all sorts of artworks?

Crystal16:05So, I would say the Vietnamese greats would obviously be a priority. But actually, there's wonderful art from the Philippines, as you know, and from Indonesia. So, it's funny because he has a more romantic, he likes more romantic pieces. But I like all of the bold, crass, naughty, in your face, wild pieces. So, it's nice to see both of them in the family collection.

Mike16:32that's terrific and and where are these displayed are they in the family home or or homes or do you ever share this artwork with other members of the public

Crystal16:39so we do have a lot in storage from time to time we will work with museums for some of their exhibitions but primarily it's in storage and and he has spoken about maybe putting up a gallery or but that's just I said, dad, okay, when you have time, no rush, but yeah, we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

Mike17:06That's excellent. We've spoken to a couple of families on this podcast, actually, who work hard to document their history or build a family archive, things like diary entries or important pieces of artwork that remind them of a time. And so I think that even if it's just an art collection, it's incredibly powerful, the stories that are often attached to those pieces, which also brings family together.

Crystal17:28That's a good point. I think I will propose that as part of our maybe next holiday activity because he does have great stories linked to certain acquisitions, right? It's like that piece that you always wanted or that piece that just came to you. It's lovely.

Mike17:47Amazing. So, are there any other family traditions that you observe that maybe others don't? I love to hear about the way families come together and do things or celebrate things together.

Crystal18:00Yes, we do have a tradition to honor my grandmother. She is really the matriarch. She is almost a thousand percent of who I am today. My dad was just a vehicle that executed who I am today. But once a year, we eat vegetarian for the entire month in her honor because she was vegetarian herself. So every August, whenever I'm with my friends, my friends will be like, well, it's vegetarian month, Crystal. So we'll go to this restaurant and sit at that one. And it's lovely. So it's not just something that we observe, but people who are close to us, such as my forum mates also understand it and they partake in it with me when we meet up.

18:40So it's very nice.

Mike18:40That's really nice. And you mentioned earlier that she was a rebel in her time and you are the incarnation. Is that right? Do you embody her rebellious streak.

Crystal18:51I hope that I do. I hope that I do. One thing that I do embody for sure, which I got from her is she was very, she was not shy to voice her opinion when she truly felt it represented what she stood for. And one, one fascinating story that, that I will never forget. I heard that when she was first a journalist before she started her magazine, she wrote a rebuttal to an American correspondent who penned very unkind things about Vietnamese women.

19:26You know, he said that Vietnamese women, you know, kind of throw themselves at the GIs and, you know, whatever men will say about that. And she actually wrote back. She said, hey, listen, it's supply and demand, bro. You know, if there's no demand, there would be no supply. And also keep in mind, also keep in mind, you know, these women that you see are left to find an income for not just their parents, but their younger siblings and all good stuff, because all the men were at war. So there aren't many job options, there is a high demand. So it's not, you think this is by choice, you know, it is a decision, yes, but it's a decision that

20:02structurally, they had to choose. So she penned that down and her publisher didn't want to publish it. And so she's like, forget it, I'll do it myself. So I do believe that I inherited that from her. And I don't think it's just an American thing. You know, she, yeah.

Mike20:14And that was in the seventies, was it?

Crystal20:20That was in the seventies. Yeah.

Mike20:20And are there any particular causes or ideas that get you fired up as well?

Crystal20:28Surely just, I will forever be just an advocate for everything women related. I do, you know, women in the manufacturing industry, just everything related to women. So there's, there's any time that I get approached by a women-only fund or whenever I meet a woman entrepreneur, I'm like, yes, please just tell me more. That will keep me going for a while.

Mike20:48Fantastic. And you're a great example, leading by example as well.

Crystal20:55Thank you. Thank you.

Mike20:58So I want to change tact here a little bit and talk about failure for a minute. Do you have a failure that later set you up for success or a key favorite failure that you remember from history that somehow shaped your journey so far?

Crystal21:16Yes. I don't know if I would call this a favorite failure, but it was definitely one of the more memorable ones. When I first joined at 22, I was very adamant about not being overconfident, right? I wanted to make sure that we hired individuals who were in the industry longer, they knew more. So I made the mistake of thinking that experience translated to quality. So actually, my first big hire was a supply chain manager. And she worked at big wood manufacturing companies. She had long tenure, she was just very good on paper.

21:56And my help was like, Yes, okay, I found someone that I feel that could help me build something. And all that wonderful, that wonderful dream until I found out that she, you know, she just had her own agenda. She tried to recruit people from our side. She was in a stage of her life where she didn't want to just work for a corporation anymore.

22:14It was an interim thing. And she was trying to do something on her own, which, okay, I understand. But my biggest failure was really just thinking that she could bring more magic that I could bring. And that's when I understood that it's not just experience or skill or skillset, but it's really just the heart. So wherever your heart is, you'll be great.

22:37And you want to find people who has where the heart beats the same way your heart beats. And I will never forget, she was my first hire and my first fire. And yeah, that was the takeaway from that. And I haven't changed from that since.

Mike22:53It's a terrific story. And it's also not something that you'll find in a business textbook. It's something that you actually get boots on the ground, operational experience, and you start to develop that gut instinct and feel for what's working and what's appropriate in your organization and what's not.

Crystal23:10So true. Yeah. I like that. It resonates.

Mike23:10So tell me about the future for Vina Wood and also the family more broadly. Do you plan to diversify the family's interests or are you looking to maintain a deep specialization in your current industry?

Crystal23:30Where we're going right now is a combination of both breadth and depth. So I would say on the depth side, we, of course, are going more vertically integrated. We're looking into acquiring forest land, just really thinking out 50 years plus out. But in terms of breadth, we are exploring new product categories. But what I'm most excited about on the depth side is that we plan on launching our own brand to the end consumer in Vietnam and eventually expanding throughout Southeast Asia.

24:04So that's going to be fun because we won't just be just a B2B business. We will have actual face time with the end user. So that's a nice chapter that I'm ready for.

Mike24:16Yeah, that's really exciting. And a whole set of new challenges, no doubt.

Crystal24:20Oh, yes. Yeah. Darn, darn.

Mike24:24Now, you've absolutely piqued my interest. I love... Anytime someone says 50 years out, or 100 years out, or something very long-term, I always want to dive in on that. So tell me about the long-term planning that goes into potentially acquiring forestry assets to vertically integrate into the business. I think that's fascinating.

Crystal24:45It's always a family... Or founders, I'll say. It's always a founder's dream to establish something that your generations after would responsibly be the stewards for. And I felt so blessed that my dad and I can sit down and talk about where do we see this going in 50 years and 100 years. And whether we get there or not, I feel it's wonderful just to have that dream with the generation above for me.

25:13And so right now, we really just were like, yeah, let's do it. Let's just let's look for it. So we're inquiring, but keeping in mind, it may not go in that direction. It may, but again, for me, it's just the journey of dreaming that up with my dad that really excites me. So that's where my headspace is right now.

Mike25:30I love that. I think anything that endures the test of time and that ability to set a long-term vision for family and talk about stewardship. I mean, it's a lot of what we talk about on this podcast and I find it deeply inspiring when people can often set aside their own ego to plan something for the next generation or the generation after that. I think it's a great intellectual exercise, if nothing else.

Crystal25:58I agree.

Mike25:59Another question, if you don't mind, on that, talking about the future and you individually, do you think you are where you're going to be basically forever now? Or do you also think that you might have other ventures or adventures in your future as well, separate to the family business?

Crystal26:17I do believe that there's still a lot of color on my canvas that's yet to be painted. And so, I do believe that we've got a long life ahead of us. And if I really just stayed in wood the whole time, then shame on me, right? So, I will say that my commitment and my love for this business will always be strong. I do have faith that we will have wonderful people that can keep it going strong and I'll always be involved. But I would say that it's a big wide world out there.

26:50There's a lot that the family can do to contribute to society even. So that's the direction that I would like to go.

Mike26:58Great answer. Great answer. Now, I want to go back to something that you said earlier, just because I think it's such a fascinating topic, you mentioned the father-daughter forums that you have put in place. Can you tell us a little bit more about that? There's some people in the audience that aren't familiar with forum necessarily. They're not necessarily YPOers, but this is a great concept that you and I have both benefited from in our lives. But a father-daughter forum sounds particularly interesting. Can you tell us a little bit about how you first implemented that and some of the learnings that have come out of the process, please?

Crystal27:35Yes, happy to share. So it actually started when he and I were talking about transition, right? How can we start transitioning some responsibilities from him to myself to free up his time to do other things? And so it's easy to sit and discuss, but no one was really holding us accountable to execute other than ourselves. But we would either get caught up in certain things or maybe when we return to the topic, there'd be a conversation where I don't remember that. So what happened was we decided to bring on a coach to coach us through this process.

28:12And we used this coach actually also as a mediator or also trained to hold forum sessions of groups of many size. And so it was his first family forum type session and between multi-generation adults. So it was really... He was really jumping in it too with us. Yeah, it was new for him. But we... Over time, over the course of two years, we committed to working together once a month or once every couple of months.

28:42And the moderator was there, our coach was there, and he was the one that held us accountable. He was the one that reminded us what we said, what we didn't say. He was the one that helped us flesh out what was important, help us be held accountable if we didn't fulfill what we committed. So in itself, it was a wonderful format to engage and have him around. And, you know, over time, it just kind of evolved into to have it.

29:07So we started having there and then over time we were able to hold it on our own. But I would say best practice wise, it is good to have a third party involved when you start. And I would say it is also good to bring a third party back every so often, just so that you can be more focused more on your thoughts rather than just being respectful of the structure.

29:31Because sometimes, you know, you can't, you can't be mindful of both. So it's nice to have someone else do that for you.

Mike29:36Yeah. And just to clarify too, this is not you and your father getting together to talk business strategy once a month and making commitments to each other about who's going to do what. This goes far beyond that, doesn't it?

Crystal29:48Yes. Yeah. So we'll talk about light things like, okay, we need to plan our father-daughter trip because we also have a father-daughter trip once a year. We need to plan our family trip. Yeah. And then we'll also talk about, okay, what are certain things that we need to take care of the family that hasn't been checked off yet?

30:05and then and then we'll also talk about oh well crystal how's your personal life how is how's that and then i i would start talking about my concerns and he would share you know that's not something some parents and some some children can talk about that over coffee and sometimes we can but when when there are deeper questions you can't just have that over coffee right when you talk about like hey mistakes what mistakes did you make that you don't want me to make when you were in a relationship. What things do you wish you know? Right. You can't just have that over coffee.

Mike30:37No, no. How do you bring that up?

Crystal30:37Yeah. Yeah. How do you bring it up? So it's, so those are, those are the topics that we would, we would touch upon in these father daughter forms.

Mike30:45Really powerful. And I imagine the structure provides you with some safety to have those conversations and those difficult or, or deeper questions and still feel comfortable in the environment.

Crystal30:56It does. Yeah. Yeah. It does. Yeah.

Mike30:56That's cool. Tell me about these trips. You mentioned a father-daughter trip and a family trip.

Crystal31:06Is that right? Yes. Yes. I knew at a very early age that our family was quite different in the sense that we will be a blended family. He will get married. He will have children. I would just be the eldest of that lot. And so one commitment we made was, okay, Crystal, when you start your family, when dad has another family, we all code this harmoniously, but we still want to protect this us-ness that we have, this partnership we've had ever since I was young. So how it started off was actually when I was younger, there would just be family trips and he and I were the only ones in the family. He would say, okay, Crystal, here's your budget. Pick a city, pick a country.

31:44You will be my tour guide. You are responsible for planning everything. This was before you could really book things online. And he said, that's going to be our time. Once a year, we will take a trip together and you will plan it. And then once we got older, that evolved into, okay, it doesn't matter where you are in your life, which city you're in, doesn't matter where dad is, which city I'm in, what responsibilities do we have? We commit one week out of a year.

32:08It's just us two. So that's nice. And then we'll also do family trips with the whole family, but we do make sure that we have our time together.

Mike32:17And amazing life skills that I bet you developed in having to plan and manage a budget and learn about all of these destinations too. That's terrific.

Crystal32:25Yeah. You learn how to avoid being scammed. You also learn how to get scammed as well.

Mike32:31You learn from getting scammed.

Crystal32:33That is correct. That is correct. They go together, but it's fun. Yeah. It was nice. He gave me a lot of organizational champion-ish type skills at a young age without me knowing.

Mike32:43And I love that you describe your relationship as a partnership for so long as well. I think that's nice.

Crystal32:48Yeah. It felt like it. It feels like it.

Mike32:50Yeah. So this brings us time for our final question. And it's a question that we actually ask all of our guests, but related to the past one, it is imagine that you're writing a letter to your children. What is one lesson or idea that you don't think many would mention, but you consider important to understand?

Crystal33:10I would say if I were to write a letter to my children, I would really emphasize that they truly know what they stand for. And what I mean by that is, you'll make decisions your entire life daily, every second of every minute of every day. And it could be conscious, it could be subconscious, they could be very big, they could be very small.

33:33But the way you come to these decisions is really rooted in your belief system and your value system. And I've always found it to be important to be happy with who you see in the mirror when you wake up every day, and equally happy with who you see in the mirror before you go to bed at night. And one of the ways I feel you can achieve that is to truly recognize that however you operate in your day, how you treated people, how you conducted your business, how you spent your time, how you prioritize your time, all of that should reflect who you are. And if you feel there's a conflict on how you operated versus how you feel, then you don't really know what you stand

34:17for yet. There's a disconnect there. And if you don't know yet what you stand for, then you will continuously feel conflict, which is unhealthy, which refrains you from being the best version of yourself. So I do believe know what you truly stand for and have the habit of doing that mental check on a frequent basis because you are ultimately responsible for what you put out in the world, the good, the bad, the frustration. And it's okay to be frustrated. It's okay. Just kind of recalibrate at the end of your day and be like, would I do that differently?

34:52Why is it that I did that? Oh, I understood why I did that. Okay. You know, just that's what I would say.

Mike34:57That's fantastic. And I can definitely see your grandmother coming at you the way you describe her.

Crystal35:03Thank you.

Mike35:06Really know what you stand for. That's a great answer. Thank you for sharing that with us, Crystal. And look, I think this will end up being the first of many conversations. So I'm so glad that we could connect and hear a little bit of your story today. Wonderful. Thanks for being here.

Crystal35:20Thank you so much, Mike.

Mike35:21Thanks. Thanks for listening to The Business of Family. You'll find the transcript and key ideas from this conversation at businessoffamily.net, along with the Business Family Diagnostic. It's free, and it shows you where your own family stands. And if someone in your family should hear this episode, please send it to them too. I'm Mike Boyd. Until next time, take care.